Supporting adults with their wellbeing - How we can help

Being a child’s caregiver is incredibly rewarding, but it can also be challenging and at times, emotionally demanding. Many adults are juggling work, relationships, finances and the many responsibilities involved in raising children – all while trying to take care of themselves.

It is important to remember that your wellbeing matters, not just for your own sake, but for your child’s too.

Research shows that when caregivers are mentally healthy, children are more likely to thrive emotionally, socially and academically. Seeking support is not a sign of weakness – it is an act of strength and love.

If you are feeling anxious, stressed, burnt out, or just need someone to talk to, please know that you are not alone and there are resources available that could help.

Please contact the FLO Team if you would like to talk about how we can help if you are feeling anxious or concerned.

We can signpost you to agencies that can support you and your family.

Factors that may have a negative impact on an adult’s wellbeing

There are many reasons why an adult might be struggling with their mental health. Although this list is not exhaustive, some of these may include:

· Stress or burnout

· Relationship strain

· Personal mental health challenges (depression, anxiety, PTSD, OCD… etc.)

· Past trauma (e.g. childhood abuse or domestic violence).

· Postpartum mental health issues

· Financial worries (job insecurity or debt)

· Social pressures (lack of social support or isolation, cultural expectations, guilt or pressures from social media)

· Life transitions (loss of a loved one, relocations)

· Looking after a child with additional needs (SEND, disabilities, behavioural difficulties)

Things that might help

There are several techniques you can use if you are feeling anxious or overwhelmed, which can help to regulate your body and restore you to a state of calm in the moment.

Deep breathing: breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, breathe out for 6-8 seconds

Why it works: it activates your parasympathetic nervous system to calm your body

Listening to calm music: sound of nature, or a calming playlist

Why it works: it can lower cortisol and shift your mood

The cold water trick: splash cold water on your face or use an ice pack on your neck

Why is works: it stimulates the vagus nerve, resetting the stress response

Move your body: go for a walk, stretch or jump up and down

Why it works: it disrupts the stress loop and releases endorphins

Check in on your basic needs: are you hungry, thirsty or need a nap?

Why it works: your physical needs are strongly connected to your wellbeing

Grounding techniques (5-4-3-2-1): name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste

Why it works: it brings your focus back to the present moment.

Tips to improve your mental health over time

Here are 10 useful tips that may help to improve your mental health and general wellbeing:

Acknowledge Your Feelings - recognise and accept how you are feeling, without guilt.

Talk To Someone - Open up to a friend, partner, therapist or support group. The FLO team at school are also available to signpost you to useful resources. You do not have to go through this alone.

Manage Your Expectations - There is no such thing as a perfect parent or caregiver, despite what you might see on social media.

Set Boundaries - Say no to extra responsibilities that stretch you too thin. Prioritise what is important to you.

Delegate - If you can, share household responsibilities with others in your household

Dedicate Time For You - Even 10-15 minutes a day (of reading, walking or breathing) can reset your brain

Create Simple Routines - Predictable routines can help all members of the household feel less chaotic and more in control.

Unplug - Taking regular breaks from screens and social media can help to reduce stress and social pressures.

Move Your Body - Regular movement – even a light walk or stretch – can help to reduce stress hormones.

Prioritise Sleep - Quality sleep is crucial to positive mental health. Switching off from devices 30 minutes before bed can improve the quality of sleep.

Relationship support

Relate offers counselling for:

· children and young people

· people in relationships

· families

They have a network of centres and can be contacted by email, phone and live chat. They also offer practical tips and guides to help manage common relationship issues.

Relate also offers support and guidance on menopause and its impact on women in relationships.

Other organisations and resources

· Marriage Care is a national charity, specialising in adult couple relationships.

· Citizens Advice offers free confidential advice online, over the phone and in person.

· DAD info offers peer-to-peer support and advice for Dads.

· The Fatherhood Institute raises the profile of 'involved fatherhood'.

· Working with Parents Guide, Knowledge Pool [PDF, 556KB]

Reducing Parental Conflict

· The Good Things Foundation have created a selection of videos to show the impact of parental conflict on children and young people.

· Changes and Stages by OnePlusOne talks about some of the different stages in a relationship and how to get to a place of mutual respect.

· Advice for parents managing stress and anger

Co-Parenting Apps

There are a number of co-parenting apps available which offer share calendars, expense functions and ways for parents to communicate with each other. They each have their own offering and range in costs. These include:

· AppClose

· Our Family Wizard

· 2Houses

· Talking parents

Wellbeing Support Sites

Samaritans (Confidential support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair)

Mental Health Support - NHS (NHS site sharing mental health and support website)

Anxiety UK (Charity providing support if you have been diagnosed with an anxiety condition)

Calm (CALM is the Campaign Against Living Miserably. A charity providing a mental health helpline and webchat)

Men’s Health Forum (24/7 stress support for men by text, chat and email)

Mental Health Foundation (Provides information and support for anyone with mental health problems or learning disabilities)

Mind (Promotes the views and needs of people with mental health problems)

BucksMind (Promotes the views and needs of people with mental health problems in Buckinghamshire)

Buckinghamshire Wellbeing Support (A range of wellbeing support sites)

Every Mind Matters (A range of support for wellbeing)

Parents Helpline (For detailed advice, emotional support and signposting about a child or young person up to the age of 25) Tel: 0808 802 5544 (Monday - Friday 9:30am - 4:00pm)